Why I Never Shut Up About Body Image

18 August

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Top - Zara (similar) | Skirt - ASOS | Sandals - ASOS | Bag - Ted Baker

About a month ago, I wrote this post about why I don't want to stress about my clothes size anymore. I posted a photo on Instagram to promote it, as you do, and one of my friends commented on it to say that she found my post "fatphobic".

I was really confused about this, as my point was supposed to be that size didn't matter. When I asked her why she thought this, she said that I implied that I wouldn't be happy if I was bigger.

I respect this opinion.

However.

I was talking about my relationship with my body and no-one else's. I know what a healthy body is for me; one that I feel comfortable in. I know that I wouldn't feel comfortable in my body if it was a lot bigger and I know that if I was bigger, it would be because I wasn't taking care of my body.

We are all different. You can be fat and healthy, but I wouldn't be. When I put on weight, it's because I'm not making healthy choices. I'm allowed to be aware of this. I'm also allowed to take steps to lose weight, if I want to.

The phrase thin privilege was brought up, and I thought about it for a bit. While it's true that thin bodies are seen as something to aim towards, that doesn't mean that people who fall into this category aren't allowed to be insecure, and share those insecurities.

Secondly, I am not particularly thin. I'm a curvy girl. I have flabby bits. I have skinny bits. I'm entitled to dislike parts of my body and I'm entitled to want to change them. There's no shame in being unhappy in your body.

Something I've found is that very slim women are heavily represented in the media. With the advent of social media, plus sized women now also have a platform and a voice. That's amazing and definitely a step in the right direction.

What I don't see a lot of is the middle ground. That's women who aren't skinny, but aren't plus size either. The women who are being told that they need to lose weight to attain the "perfect body" (doesn't exist, just in case you were wondering) by the media, but also told to check their thin privilege.

It can get a wee bit confusing, and you kind of feel like you aren't allowed to talk about how you're feeling.

Writing about my relationship with my body helps me, and hopefully, if you fit into this weird in-between category as well, it will help you.

I can tell you that I was a fat kid. I was bullied for it. I remember how horrible it feels.

Around age 13, I started to lose weight and went the opposite way. I was a size 8. I also only ate one meal a day. I still wasn't happy with my body. In fact, I'm a hell of a lot more confident now than I ever was when I was skinny.

Body confidence isn't the size in your jeans or the amount you weigh. It isn't a number. And anyone who feels insecure about their body should be able to express it without someone dismissing their feelings, whether they're a size 2 or a size 22.

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