My First Fake Tanning Experience

09 May


A girl from Liverpool who's never tanned, say whaaat? I was an emo kid at school, okay? My school shirts were stained with black eyeliner rather than orange tan. And aside from an unsuccessful one time run in with that Dove gradual tan rubbish, I've just never felt the need to slap a bit of the brown stuff on.

Until now.

Being an English rose is all well and good until you want to get your legs out and people are BLINDED by the whiteness of your shins. It also makes them look a bit flabby, if we're being really really honest.

Anyway, I decided to pop my fake tan cherry a while ago. It was just a case of finding the one before biting the bullet.

My biggest fear was ending up either orange or patchy. When I say I'm pale I mean pretty much transparent, so any missed spots would stand out like a beacon of shame.

I asked my friend Lucy, who is always fabulously tanned, what she uses and she recommended Superdrug's own brand self tanning mousse.

However, I came across the St Moriz self tanning mousse in medium when I was in Home Bargains on Sunday and at £2.99, I thought I'd give it a whirl. It comes in a sturdy feeling, white, plastic bottle with a simple design.

I was planning on applying the tan before bed and leaving it on overnight but I was planning on going for a run the next morning and didn't want to sweat my new glowing skin off.

So, I had a shower, exfoliated and moisturised as instructed, then began applying the tan at around 5pm.


First things first, I learned that you cannot use vinyl gloves to apply this stuff as they make it very streaky. I don't own a tanning mitt (obviously), so I just used my bare hands. This was obviously a mistake, as I now have a very sexy brown line in between my fingers. Lesson learnt.

Secondly, although it's a mousse, this stuff melts fast! I kept rubbing it between my hands before applying at first, no idea why, and it turned into liquid straight away. Colour-wise it was more of a brown/green than orange, which calmed my nerves slightly.

I started from the bottom up, and even applied the tan to my face. I was curious! Then I went over any parts that looked a bit streaky again. Some parts of my body seemed to deflect the tan somehow, but it all seemed to look even by the time I was done. This took a looong time, I have no idea how people have the patience to do it every few days.

I was pleasantly surprised by how little mess there was during application. The only bit of tan that went somewhere it shouldn't was on the bottle and a tiny bit on the side of my bath.

Once applied, the tan dried in super quick time so I didn't have to walk around looking like John Wayne for too long. I whacked on some loose pyjamas and waited.

For five and a half hours.

Then I hopped into the shower and washed it all off.

Top tip for fake tanning? Don't use your nice white towels to dry yourself after washing it off.

The result

I'm either excellent at fake tanning or this stuff is foolproof. Aside from my fingers, which was my fault for using my bare hands to apply the stuff, and a few tiny patches on my arms where I get eczema, I am completely streak free. I don't exactly look like a bronzed goddess, but I'm less alarmingly white now. It's what you might describe as a healthy glow.

Will I keep using fake tan? Maybe. I'm quite lazy when it comes to body care, but I'll definitely be reaching for the St Moriz when I know I'll be letting my limbs loose in public.

Do you use fake tan or do you keep it au naturel? Have you got any recommendations?

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